Thedude3445, Author at Hands Held in the Snow

Chapter 57: On Fire

Beatrice and Runa stepped outside to see what all the commotion was. There was a fire emerging in the direction of Castle Balarand, pillowing smoke rising into the air. What could it be? Beatrice quickly ruled out that Runa was enacting any of her schemes since she too seemed surprised. It must have been an accident, like a gunpowder spill or a kitchen fire raging out of control.

The fire was in the direction of Emi’s house…

Emi was probably okay. She may not have even been home, being the rich and famous elite she was. Likely she was out at some mansion by Lake Geoffrey, riding animals and drinking fruit juice and doing whatever rich people did in their free time.

…Beatrice felt like walking towards her house regardless, just to make sure it wasn’t affected by the fire. Despite the fervor on the streets with the protests, it seemed the most sensible thing to do. “Come on,” she told Runa. “We’re taking a walk.”

“But my mother told me not to leave your house or she’d shut down my laboratory for a month.”

“We’ll be back before she comes to pick you up,” Beatrice said. Runa’s mom was supposed to come by in fifteen minutes, so that was unlikely. But it was probably better anyway if she was able to impede Runa’s quest for world domination, even if only for a month. With whatever was going on, it was also possible that Ms. Arakawa was not going to be able to pick her daughter up soon after all. She had a bad feeling about that fire.

The mostly melted snow still laid on the ground, off to the side or on top of roofs. It was still too cold to go outside without a scarf and gloves. But the growing fires in the distance looked to change that. Beatrice couldn’t tell if it was just her mind playing tricks, or if there really was a growing warmth around the area.

They walked towards the city center and Beatrice quickly noticed an eerie calm had set over the streets. People were not emerging from their homes and the growing fire was seemingly being ignored. She noticed why as she grew closer and heard the banging of boots against the ground.

A group of two or three dozen soldiers, not in any consistent uniform and certainly not belonging to Dannark, marched down the Grand Concourse. In a cart that rolled behind them there was a cage full of prisoners.

The realization hit Beatrice like a brick against her skull.

This was a full-on uprising.

She and Runa rushed to the city center with all their speed; she didn’t take the time to explain the situation to Runa, because it was unlikely she would be able to understand the dynamics of the situation quickly enough, but she knew she needed to find her and make sure she was safe immediately.

The large fire was actually a controlled bonfire in front of the steps to the castle. There were a growing number of people gathering in a crowd around it, and many of these same men and women in ragged outfits were standing at the crowd’s center.

One man that Beatrice immediately recognized was Mr. Ulric Statusian.

This… couldn’t be happening.

Why was he…

How could he be…

Beatrice lost all ability for reason and rationality.

Ulric Statusian stood atop a box and shouted at the crowd, brandishing a sword up in the air. “We have had enough of the tyrannical rule of the Dannark Empire!” he shouted. “Just this week, Dannark demanded King Kline must be turned over, or else they will invade Fathie by land and sea. Will we stand for our ruler being treated like a common criminal?”

“No!” the crowd chanted back.

“We, the common folk of Balarand, will take back Elince for ourselves and destroy any traitor to the crown who stands in our way. We will save King Kline, and we will save our kingdom!

“There are people all over the city just like us who have joined the cause to protect Balarand. Look what we have captured–” He hoisted up a sparkling object instantly familiar to any citizen in the city–”The Jewel of Elince is ours. With this, our enemies are hopeless. We will triumph.”

The crowd went wild.

“Take up arms and join us!”

The men and women in uniforms began handing out weapons–everything from pikes and axes to sharpened gardening tools–to those in the crowd. They weren’t trained soldiers, but they were enraged and riled up, and things were sure to turn violent any moment now.

She noticed the cage of prisoners, now wheeled up next to the bonfire for display purposes. Judging by their clothing, those people consisted of the same types of folk that went to Mammoth Pass with her last month, still dressed in whatever fancy cloaks or nightgowns they wore before they were seized.

Ulric Statusian shouted, “These men and women have collaborated with Dannark to keep the power structure stable. These men and women compromised the integrity of our kingdom so they could keep their wealth, and we will not allow them to get away with their robbery. These men and women will stand trial for their crimes. If you find a traitor, take them prisoner and bring them to us!”

Beatrice gasped.

Emi… Her entire family… She begged her mind not to think about that right now.

Runa, who had been taking all this with an unusual sternness, said only, “This will negatively impact my plans for the Grand Experiment. We must find a way to stop this.”

“What can we possibly do?” Beatrice balked.

“We… Hmm, no. Not that either. We… Aha. We’re going to perfect my experiment and unleash it upon all who dare stand up to me!” With that, Runa took off in a sprint northwards. Ahhhhh…. No, no, not during the middle of an armed insurrection… This girl…!

Beatrice knew she needed to stop Runa before she got hurt. But just as she began to take her first step, her eyes met with Ulric Statusian’s. He smiled and his face brightened. He began walking through the crowd towards her. She took off in a sprint.

She didn’t want to be involved in any of this. And she didn’t want anything bad to happen to Runa. So all she could do was run.

“Wait up!” Beatrice shouted. Runa was fast, though. Way too fast. And Beatrice hadn’t done much physical activity since she got back from Mammoth Pass…

Still, the drive to not be captured by the rebels and to not let Runa do anything foolish kept her going, huffing and puffing all the way. In the middle of absolute chaos on the streets, and this girl was running? Why?

She must have run for twenty minutes before her strength finally gave out and she was forced to walk the rest of the way.

When she finally reached Runa’s house, her ultimate destination, she realized the entire neighborhood was deserted. No shops open, no kids playing on the street. If anyone knew about the rebellion, they were either hiding in their homes, fleeing the city, or joining in with the fight.

Balarand really was about to change forever, wasn’t it?

Beatrice entered the Arakawa home and went into the basement.

Runa was already back in her laboratory, yelling curses at the people who inspected it earlier in the day. “They stole my schematics!” she yelled. “How will I replicate my experiments now? This is a disaster, Beatrice. A complete disaster, I say.”

“Replicate what experiment? What are you talking about, Runa? Why in blazes are we back at your–”

Runa held up a finger to her mouth. “Shush.”

Beatrice was so flabbergasted by this command that she obeyed it.

Runa rummaged through a stack of books and revealed a stone protruding out of the wall. She pressed it inwards and another wall to the laboratory spun around, revealing–

“Oh my Gods,” Beatrice said.

“You’re safe. I am so pleased,” Runa said with a grin.

It was a monster.

A repulsive, nearly naked monster.

It was a large humanoid creature, breathing in and out quietly as it slept chained up to the wall. Its eyes bulging out of its eye sockets, its skin pale, its hands gigantic.

“I have made the world’s first homunculus,” Runa said. “I used naught but two bunnies and the hair of that beautiful companion of yours. But I must make more if I am to be successful. I must get those schematics back. Help me, Beatrice. You are my greatest hope. Rather, the most convenient hope.”

Beatrice fainted.

<== Previous ♡ Next ==>

Chapter 56: Hanging with the Boys

“…And that’s how it went,” Emi said. “I’ve failed at everything I’ve ever tried for.”

She finished the story of her despair as she sat on the floor, hugging a pillow and burying her head in it. This was the third time she told this tale in the past week, each time to the same audience. Said audience, Tia, rolled his eyes and confirmed to Emi that her story had not been as moving as she hoped.

“You see, the last time you told me this story, you put a lot more blame on Beatrice,” said Tia, who was wearing a short skirt and dress shirt, a summer outfit, even though they were sitting in his bedroom in the middle of the day, and it was still quite cold outside. His boyfriend was also there, his arm over Tia’s shoulder. “It seems to me like you are still not seeing the real situation because you have simply shifted the blame from her to yourself. Perhaps blaming people for what happened isn’t exactly going to work.”

“I… I just don’t know,” she said. Emi’s eyes were essentially dried-out at this point. Ever since she returned from Mammoth Pass, she had tried everything she could to forget about Beatrice, but that very quickly failed, so she tried thinking it out. That failed, too. It had been months, but she was still wracked by it. “But… Tia… I’m glad you’ve been here to listen to me. I went so long without talking to anyone that I was probably… driving myself insane.” She laughed a little bit, but it still sounded fake to her own ears.

Tia and his boyfriend had been trying to cheer Emi up and invited Emi over to the Knoll residence the other day for no other reason than to hang out. Well, that and the fact that Balarand was getting a little bit tense lately. By tense, she meant full-scale rioting, so heavy that Dannark soldiers were making arrests by the hour. Emi wanted to be out there helping those people rage against their oppressors. And yet for some reason she was out here, far away from it all, doing nothing more productive than hanging out with these two men. It was shameful, but she didn’t even think she had the mental capacity to help these days.

Actually, she had never caught Tia’s current boyfriend’s name. He was a tall, muscular man with broad shoulders and a sharp head of hair, certainly the type of young man that girls and boys would go crazy over, though he very rarely spoke, preferring to let his face communicate his thoughts. And Emi had a feeling it was far too late to ask for his name, since they had spent time together on several occasions now.

He was still nice, she guessed. Even if Emi hadn’t been cheered very much, the young man’s smile was heartening.

Ugh, her stomach gurgled. She had been eating so many salmon binds this month she had probably gained five pounds…

“Thank you guys for helping me out,” Emi said. “I think I’d rather be a slug than a human, though… Slugs don’t have to worry about marriage and relationships and family. They just crawl around and eat.”

“Slugs are sort of gross,” said Tia.

“I used to love finding slugs when I was a child. I ruined so many dresses…” Emi wasn’t sure why she was reminiscing about her childhood all of a sudden, but it was nice to be thinking about something warm.

Beatrice was very warm…

Emi refused to keep crying at this. No, she was going to think about something new and dedicate her life to a new cause. The cause of keeping slug populations fed and healthy so that they could become the dominant species in Tsubasa, because unlike humans, slugs were kind and generous and told their girlfriends about their secrets before it was too late to fix things.

“Emi… here is another handkerchief,” Tia said.

Oh, she was crying after all, despite her dried-out eyes. “Th… thanks.”

She knew she was getting better, slowly, but a normal person wouldn’t have gone into some manic fit of melancholy about something as stupid as heartbreak. Emi just felt like she was some permanently broken human. It was… lame.

“Say, what is that little thing you’re working on?” Tia asked. “You are always tinkering on your little toys, but this one…”

Emi looked down at the object in her hands. She hadn’t even been thinking about it while she was assembling it, since this was the fifth one she had designed. “Sorry. I keep building these stupid things because, uh, it makes me feel better. I think.”

“Oh, dear, do not ever feel bad about your wonderful work,” Tia said. “If anyone had half the talent you did, our world would be filled with these gearbox machines.”

“It’s nothing special, really.”

“Then what is this machine in your hands? Is it simply that unremarkable?”

The device was about done except for the small wheel she needed to attach. She put that on, tightened the screw, and set it on the floor. “It’s like a cart, the kind a seller would carry, but, uh, tiny. I’m trying to figure out the best way to make it so I can build a big one someday.” She fiddled with the control gears and wound them up. “So, what I want to do is program the path, and then let the thing go…” She gave it a push, and the tiny cart began moving forwards all on its own. Self-propelled. “And if it worked in big size, maybe it would be like a food cart that sellers could take around the city and you could get food out by inserting a coin. Or, older folk could take their groceries home without worrying about heavy bags.”

“Holy Bk’Man,” exclaimed Tia. “You are indeed a madwoman.”

“But it’s still broken. See?” The toy cart came to a stop.

“I don’t see.”

“Well, I want to make it turn. But… so far I haven’t figured it out.”

“Who cares? You have invented something that could change the world!”

“I doubt it,” Emi said. “I don’t think anyone would want to build a bigger one.”

Tia pointed at her, his finger so close it was nearly touching her neck. “You are a L’Hime, a member of one of the most influential families in the city, and a genius on a level that is downright magical. It is your imperative to make sure that your creations grace all of Tsubasa.”

Emi giggled. She was just trying to cope with heartbreak by building stupid toys. It wasn’t like she was doing anything special. And yet Tia Knoll here was acting like she was on the verge of inciting a new holy era, a mechanical revolution. She couldn’t help but laugh at the absurdity. And, in some way, it made her feel a little bit better to do so.

“Maybe I–”

Suddenly, the bedroom door burst open.

Three tall men dressed in ragged uniforms and with swords at their hilts barged into the room. One of them screamed, “On the floor!”

They complied immediately.

Emi’s found herself being thrown on her back and handcuffed, all in one swift motion. She yelped in pain.

What was this? They were soldiers of some sort, but not in any uniform Emi recognized. Why were they here?

She found her answer immediately. “By order of the Elincian Freedom Campaign,” one of the soldiers said, “You three are under arrest as collaborators with the Dannark Empire and traitors. You’re coming with us.”

<== Previous ♡ Next ==>

Chapter 55: A Date with Destiny (Destiny is Runa)

“And I–are you listening at all?” Runa asked.

“Yes, yes, go on,” Beatrice said, nose-deep in her current project, which was a blouse she had been sewing for weeks. Or, trying to sew at least.

After a while, she came to accept the fact that there was simply no more studying to be done for the Priesthood Exam, and so she moved onto working full-time at her new hobby. Her Mom had helped her learn the basics of sewing and now she was working at it like she always does–with extreme interest and dedication. Sewing was supposed to be a relaxing, stress-relieving activity, but as usual, Beatrice worked far beyond the point she needed to.

It still wasn’t a very good blouse so far, but it was better to practice than to listen to the incessant chatter coming from the other girl in her apartment.

In a surprise twist, for the first time in years, Runa needed to be babysat this afternoon, so she came to Beatrice’s house to visit. It was more like just hanging out with a friend, as much as one could be friends with someone like Runa. The real reason she was here was that Balarand police officers had received reports of suspicious activities and were currently rummaging through Runa’s laboratory for signs of legal infractions (they were sure to find several).

Though Beatrice didn’t know if it was safer for her here. The protests outside were loud, and growing louder. The entire city was engulfed by tens of thousands of people marching and screaming for King Kline’s safety. It had lasted for days, the chants continuing long into the night.

But here they were, Runa and Beatrice, together like they were kids again. Dad was at work, and Mom was taking a nap, so it was just them, though Runa was currently occupied with her own, er, eccentricities.

“Well… I disposed of the most incriminating evidence,” Runa continued. “But I am fearful if they use any forensic techniques, like bringing in a priest to purify the residence. My soul crystals will be sure to resonate then. Perhaps telling you all this may be a poor decision, given your choice to become the enemy.”

“You were a junior priest too, for a while,” Beatrice said. “Don’t you remember?”

“Yes, until they caught on and threw me out to deprive me access to their sensitive information. The fiends.” She began rambling again.

Runa had been eleven years old and expelled for trying to instigate a rebellion using some group spells she had uncovered. That was her finest hour, hopefully for the rest of her life. That’s Beatrice she thought at the time, at least.

Beatrice’s new pursuit to become the highest-scoring new priest of all time, if she could help it, was going very well, so well that she had literally run out of things to study. For the first time in her life, she had not a single book to read that she thought might help her improve. At this rate, she would pass the Priesthood Exams with the highest marks in the history of the church. It may not have been a particularly notable achievement since one’s score was never revealed, but she wanted to impress the world anyway.

“…if I am caught, so that I will never be exposed. Is that okay with you?”

Darn it. She was hoping she didn’t have to listen. “Um, what was the question again?”

“Oh, never mind with you. You seem to be too fully integrated into the Priesthood Propaganda Project and the treachery of sewing to pay your old friend any mind.” Runa ruminated. “Say, it seems you have abandoned that incredibly beautiful woman from before, as well.”

She only just noticed? It had been literally two months.

“If you know her contact information, I would appreciate having it. I wish very much to court her. She would be a fitting subject for my Grand Experiment, indeed.”

She hadn’t noticed anything after all!

And… Grand Experiment? Was this her codename for romance, or did she really have something sinister in mind here with Emi? Emi–

She hadn’t thought about her in a while. She had successfully blocked the woman out of her mind for, what was it, maybe three days? And now she was back.

Beatrice sobbed.

She didn’t… she didn’t mean to. She tried not thinking about her over these past few weeks; that was the best way to get some real studying done. She didn’t want to admit to herself that the only reason she was studying was to get her out of her mind as much as possible, but it was pretty obvious that was the case.

“What’s wrong?” Runa asked. “You seem to be mysteriously shedding tears. Are you perchance falling victim to a melancholic disease after being exposed to the famed Emotion Shrooms found at the summit of the Plebias Mountains?”

“No, Runa. Just shut up,” Beatrice snapped.

Runa did exactly that, her childish smirk disappearing. She sat down in a chair at the other end of the dining table and sighed. “When did we grow so far apart?”

Beatrice could ask the same thing, but about Emi.

…No, she knew that answer. She knew the exact, precise moment their relationship had ended. She was staring up at the ceiling with tears welling up in her eyes, after all. That was a very prominent image in her memories.

Beatrice, for so many months, had thrown away all logic in order to pretend they would ever be able to be together in the first place. A rich elite destined for nobility and a poor daughter of a librarian training to be a celibate priest. It was doomed from the start. A fling, just like Mr. Statusian once said. The only thing she could do was keep it out of her mind.

“Eh? Beatrice?”

“Oh, yeah, sorry,” Beatrice said. She looked down at her blouse and the water stains that covered it. “We never grew apart, Runa. I still appreciate you as, um, a friend.”

“It just feels like you keep so much from me.”

“Oh, come on, Runa, please don’t start–”

Suddenly, there was a loud booming sound, almost like a large explosion, coming from not too far away. It shook the plates on the kitchen table for a few seconds.

“Was that your house?” Beatrice asked instinctually.

“Quite unlikely,” she said. “The blast radius from my home simply could not be big enough to carry a shockwave this far away.”

Beatrice ignored the lack of denial that Runa’s house had been rigged with explosive devices, because that sound was very worrying to her. She went over the window and looked– black smoke rising from buildings on the other side of Knoll Park.

Whatever it was, it wasn’t good.

And she felt the sudden urge to check it out. Something about the timing of the explosion set a sense of panic within her. Even if it wasn’t related to Runa, it… Hm.

Mom, awoken by the shaking, came out of her bedroom, her hair all frizzed up from her sleep. “Beatrice, what was that?” she asked groggily.

“Mom, Runa and I need to leave and check something out,” she said. “May we leave?”

“Yes,” she said. Then she saw the smoky scenery out the window. She looked at Beatrice, and for a second, her expression completely changed, becoming stern, emotional, and absolutely unallowing to let her child go into whatever it was. But Beatrice stood firm. She didn’t need to justify anything. Whatever was going on, she was going to help. She was a junior priest. And Mom knew that, because her face morphed once again, back into her usual calm. “Be safe,” she added.

“We will.”

“Wait, I’m going too?” Runa asked. “I never said I’d–”

Beatrice yanked her by the wrist. “Let’s hurry.”

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Chapter 54: Sneaking Out…?

Emi stared up at her ceiling, as she tended to do for a while each morning before getting out of bed. She liked to make shapes and images in her mind out of the imperfect swirls of paint and indention. Over in the corner was a misshapen potato with one very large eye, and near it was a pridecow… but then she couldn’t see the animal anymore and her mind wouldn’t make the image again.

This was nice, but she needed something nicer.

Suddenly, she sat up in bed and looked around at her bedroom. Clothes strewn all over the floor and a stack of books toppled over. All just like she liked it. These days she made a conscious effort to lock the door every time she exited, no matter if she left the house or not, just to ensure no unwanted visitors could ever enter. If someone were to rearrange it from how she liked it, she wasn’t sure she could handle it.

But… she thought she was handling all of this fairly well. Ms. Khami hadn’t yelled at her in a really long while and since her parents weren’t home, that meant there was nobody willing to scold her no matter what she did–or in this case, didn’t do.

Today, though… felt different. Her parents arrive back in Balarand sometime this week, and they would most likely force Emi to get involved in whatever house parties or supper dates or brunch time meet-and-greets they had in store for her pre-wedding preparations. And thinking further, it was only a month, at best, before you-know-who would arrive. Soon there would be rehearsals, dress fittings, coming-of-age ceremonies, and the like. And it wouldn’t stop from there.

Emi needed to seize this day, then. She needed to jump at the opportunity to do something rash and dangerous and stupid while she was still unsupervised.

She was going to sneak out of the house and go to the marketplace! The snow had mostly melted and the weather had warmed up some, so it was time for Emi to go on an adventure!

The levers pushed around in her mind, the springs pulled and compressed. She began to formulate a new devious plan she could use to break out of this self-imposed prison and escape the L’Hime Family home without anyone noticing.

Yes… Ah, yes. Perfect.

She would have to slide down one of the pillars holding up the second floor balcony and enter the foyer, for maximum speed of course. But then there would be a high risk of being spotted by one of the many housekeepers cleaning or carrying things, so she would need to distract them first. She would do that by first going up to the third floor, where there is a lot of construction going on for renovations, and maybe… knock over a paint can while nobody was looking. It would get everyone’s attention and make a lot of people upset, which would provide ample opportunity to make her escape. Yes… this was a great plan.

So, Emi grabbed a few things she might need and stuffed them in her handbag, and locked the bedroom door behind her as she quietly looked down at the foyer and around at the second floor. There was… nobody here. Not a sound.

She ventured up to the third floor, and it appeared that this was the case here, too. Where was everyone? Was it time for a lunch break already? Emi had been sleeping in a lot lately, but this would be just too far.

Well, this just meant that escape would be a lot easier now. She made an even more risky move, hopping on a pillar and sliding from the second floor down to the first. One false move and she would have had a broken back, but… that was really fun.

Emi walked toward the front door. But as she did, she heard a rhythmic buzzing noise that grew louder with every step she took.

Pip and several other housekeepers were there in the foyer, standing in front of the door with an air of unease. They hardly seemed to notice Emi until she came their way.

Pip met her gaze, but only for a second before her eyes darted away. “Hi, Emi,” she said, her cheerful, flirty attitude replaced by curt politeness. Ever since that day Emi dropped the sauce bowl and screamed at everyone, Pip had become a lot more distant. And now, with whatever was going on outside…

“What’s going on?” she asked.

“I don’t know… It sounds like…”

Well, if she didn’t know, Emi was going to go outside and find out.

When she opened it, she realized what it was– A crowd of fury-filled protestors standing outside the gates and chanting. Screaming.

“Save King Kline! Save King Kline!” was the main message Emi could decipher, but it was supplemented by countless other yells and shouts. It was angry, but it also seemed sad, in a way. A protest with a broken heart. A protest like people were mourning something. She knew that feeling well.

And, at the same time, she realized her parents were here, too. She didn’t even know they were back. Their carriage was right in front of the gate and looked scuffed up and damaged. “Mother?” she asked.

“Emi! What are you doing out here?”

“What’s… what’s happening, Mother?” she asked. “When did you get back?”

Mother, whose face was red and eyes were sore, wiped her face off with her sleeve and frowned. “We have just returned from our emergency negotiations in Fathie, and… Listen, dear. We will explain this to you inside. You shouldn’t stay out here; it’s not safe.”

Emi realized that she wasn’t going to be sneaking today after all.

Dannark soldiers arrived to break up the crowd, but many of the protestors refused to go without being beaten down. It erupted into a scene of violence. Emi flinched, wanted to look away, but knew she couldn’t. Knew she shouldn’t.

Emi’s Father walked up to the front door. “Emi. Go inside.”

“Can’t you tell me what’s going on?”

“Come inside.” He walked past her and held open the front door for her.

The moment the door shut behind them, Mother once again burst into tears, falling to her knees and sobbing.

Father looked to Emi. “Your Mother and I tried to.. We did the best we could, and we failed the people of Elince. Our consequences were instant, as the protestors followed our carriage home. We imagine that… the rancor may continue.”

“I’m not sure I understand.”

“I– We– I’m sorry, Emi. You’ll have to excuse me.” Father had begun to cry, too.

Ms. Khami and the other housekeepers had come down to the foyer to see what all the commotion was about. Emi helped Mother to her, and then looked at Ms. Khami. “What’s going on?”

“Your parents were sent to Fathie to negotiate King Kline’s surrender,” Ms. Khami said. “They were trying to save him from being sent to criminal trial in Dannark.”

“And they failed,” Emi said, looking out a front window, and seeing the protestors past the main gate, continuing to chant to save their king’s life.

“Yes,” she said. “You had better go upstairs.”

And they failed.

The protests would continue on into the night, and then again into the next morning. No matter where Emi went in her home, she could hear the strained voices shouting through the walls.

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Chapter 53: About a Dozen of Them

St. Helens Academy was still in its winter break, so normal students were off from school for the next two months until the spring semester. The school, however, remained open for those preparing for the Priesthood Exams.

These days, even counting the Dannark guards, the school never exceeded thirty people. Today, there were only about twelve. Beatrice was the only one who had shown up every single day; the others were older, and most of them held down jobs or supported families already.

Beatrice, in her studying, was essentially alone.

Because she had wholesale banned herself from going to the library in the unlikely chance that she would run into people that she would prefer she not meet, the only good places to read in the winter were here or home. Seeing as Mom was starting to make good friends with some of the next-door neighbors and they were coming over nearly every day to chat and gossip, this was practically the only option to get any peace and quiet in the entire city.

So today, as usual. she sat, hunkered down, and… reread for the umpteenth the same materials Mr. Statusian had given her months ago.

It was all useless.

Beatrice already knew everything she possibly could to prepare for the exam. The practical application portion was the only part that she was even a little bit uncertain on and even then, the other prospective priests practiced diligently with her whenever they showed up.

In fact, while Beatrice poured over papers she knew by heart already, the other six students here today were out in the courtyard practicing cycling routines. She took a brief pause in her non-studying to watch them through the window.

The students practiced hard, even in the cold wind with the last vestiges of snow patching the dirt, even with rituals that were equally hard. These were techniques–difficult ones–to to draw energy out of one’s soul and into certain areas of the body to heal or strengthen oneself. One could, for example, draw their energy towards their fingertips so that they could deliver an electric shock to an opponent, or summon the fringes of their souls towards their mind to help calm themselves in a stressful situation. It was not expected for any of them to actually accomplish anything with them, but using the correct technique was vital for the test.

It was admirable to see them trying so hard, as pointless as it may have been.

The people out there were nice, but Beatrice tried to keep to herself most of the time. They were just so… different. Beatrice was a young girl, fresh out of junior priest school and going directly into the exams with the full support of her parents. Everyone else who came to practice here was older. They were people who had gone through an unsuccessful life and needed a fresh start; the faithless who had gotten a new conviction in their religion; divorced men, widowed women–the kinds of people you’d expect to want to join the priesthood.

Unlike them, Beatrice had made this her life’s main trajectory since childhood.

In her ambitions, just as in everything else, she was alone.

Mr. Statusian stood out with the others, drilling them while they practiced the rituals. Beatrice had tried to avoid him since she returned from Mammoth Pass. She didn’t want him rubbing her nose in everything she did. But for how blatantly she ignored his advice, she probably deserved it.

He noticed her looking at the students and met her eyes before she could glance away. He left the group and came into the study hall. At the same time, Beatrice lowered her head and buried herself in her notes.

“Beatrice?” Mr. Statusian asked.

She couldn’t think of anything to say. She couldn’t think of anything that wouldn’t get her a scolding. So her reply was a mere, “Hello.” She did not raise her eyes from her papers.

“Nice to see you studying hard as ever. That’s the girl I know.” When his remark was not met with a response, he dithered, and then added, “Well, I know you’ll do great. For the sake of Balarand, you–”

Mr. Statusian cut himself off, and then took a few steps away. Beatrice looked up to see what the matter was, and saw two men in dull brown, tattered cloaks standing at the entrance to the classroom.

His expression darkened. “What in Phyra’s name are you two–” He looked at Beatrice and cut himself off. “I’ve got to go. Keep studying, Beatrice. I’m praying for you.”

He left, and she suddenly felt overcome with a strong urge to give up and never look at a book again. Her body shook and her nose sniffled.

But now was not the time for tears. She continued to copy down notes and work as diligently as ever, even if it was pointless to continue doing so.

It was her fault, after all, that she had declined to tell her parents what had happened in Mammoth Pass. It was her fault, after all, that she had avoided contact with Mr. Statusian any time he tried to check up on her. It was her fault, after all, that she was studying here, alone, in an empty classroom on a cold winter afternoon.

After the day was over, she walked home among gray skies, head facing the cobblestone path ahead of her, the buildings around her a blurred path for her to navigate around.

An then as she entered her apartment, her Dad greeted with a cheery, “Hi, honey,” but she didn’t reply.

Her parents glanced at her worryingly, almost accusingly.

“Honey? Hey, Beatrice.” Dad got up from the kitchen table and put a hand on her shoulder. “You alright buddy?”

“Yeah.”

She didn’t want their looks. She didn’t want their emotions. She just wanted this to be over with, and she would much prefer it if they stopped being so rude.

“Okay, then. By the way, your friend Bodhi came by earlier and wanted to know–”

“I’m tired. I’m going to bed,” she said.

She wasn’t lying. The moment she closed her door, she laid down and slept.

It was better to dream when you were unconscious, she thought.

<== Previous ♡ Next ==>

Chapter 52: Helping Out Around the House

Emi dropped the diced onions into the pot and covered it with a lid. It was easier than she expected. Ms. Khami looked back at her and smiled.

“I really appreciate the help,” she said. “The other housekeepers are so overworked with deck. It was too much work for me to cook everything by myself.”

“I really enjoy this,” Emi said, her tone coming out a lot flatter and more distant than she had intended. “It’s better than being in my room, that’s for sure.” She managed a laugh but it came out too fake for her own liking.

“Emi, I know that… it has been hard for you to adjust. But know that I will always be there for you if you,” she said. “So, I thank you for letting yourself be available to me.”

“Ms. Khami?” Emi asked. “Why don’t the housekeepers eat supper with the rest of the family?”

“They are not part of the family. Most of them do not even live here,” she answered.

“But you do. You’re a L’Hime too. You’ve been more of a parent to my than my own Mother. And still you never eat with us.”

“Don’t be silly.” And that was all she had to say on the matter, it seemed.

But that wasn’t enough for Emi.

Once the meal had been prepared–large helpings of fish, rice, vegetable soup, and a bowl of lentils–Emi ran into the foyer and shouted up towards the third floor. “Hey everyone! Come on down for some lunch! We’re all eating together!”

The housekeepers came down a few minutes later, and gathered in front of the dining room in confusion. Ms. Khami stood behind Emi, and shook her head when they gave her confused looks. Emi, though, put her hands on her hips and then pointed to the dining room table. “You are the people that keep this household running, and you are never treated as well as you should be. So from now on, you are eating with the rest of us.”

“Miss L’Hime…” Ms. Khami began.

“While my parents are gone, I am head of the household, and what I say goes. Do you hear me?”

Ms. Khami said nothing.

Emi went over to the dining room fireplace and lit it. If there was going to be a supper, it needed to be a warm one. Everything had to be perfect.

“Is everyone here?” she asked. There were about eight housekeepers here now, including Pip, and all of them were covered in sweat. “Okay, let’s eat.”

The housekeepers began hesitantly sitting down around the table. Emi quickly ran in and out from the kitchen, bringing out dishes and setting them down. This was exactly what she needed to do as a L’Hime–embrace her status as a leader, and use that for benevolence and inspiration. Pip kept giving her a look, but she ignored that, because she felt great. When she actually accomplished things, Emi could–

She tripped over the carpet, and in an instant the bowl of sauce she was carrying tumbled over, crashing onto the floor, its contents spilling out and staining the carpet.

Emi collapsed onto her knees. Her eyes fixed themselves on the sauce that poured out slowly, a river of goop flowing slowly out. All of it ruined.

It… it wasn’t fair.

It wasn’t fair.

It wasn’t fair!

IT WASN’T FAIR!

…

Nothing was ever fair.

Her love for Beatrice was gone, her chances of having the life she wanted were gone, and now her chances of being a functioning human were gone, too. She was just going to exist as some sort of placeholder husk for her future children, just a cog in the gearbox of a tangled family tree.

Ms. Khami and Pip helped her to her feet. She scowled at them. They backed away.

“Hey, it’s alright, it’s okay,” Pip said. Her usual peppy tone gone, replaced with pure pity.

Emi was pointless, was useless. She despised herself almost as much as the Gods did. She marched over to the wall, took her fist, and pounded it in, cracking the wood and sending a surge of pain through her hand.

“I hate this,” she said. “I hate this!”

She was so angry, so ballistically mad at herself and everything in existence. She could feel the heat building up inside of her, as if it were rising from the fireplace, as if it were literally wrapping itself around her, ready to consume her.

And she would have let it.

But the moment she felt an ember against her back, her rage dissipated. The flames around her vanished. Her body cooled down, and she bowed her head.

“My Gods,” said Ms. Khami. “Emi, we need to get you to–”

She shoved her out of the way and ran up to her bedroom, quickly locking the door before anyone could follow.

Emi was done helping for the day.

The Gods were punishing her for something, maybe. Or perhaps it was simply destiny. There were so many explanations for why it didn’t work out, but they surely had to be something supernatural, something beyond her control.

It was either that or she was a dishonest hag who failed her girlfriend by not being honest about her life.

That was a dealbreaker in most relationships, wasn’t it?

<== Previous ♡ Next ==>

Chapter 51: Shattered

Beatrice rode back to Balarand in a carriage of her own. There was a lot of room to study, and the quiet beauty of northern Dannark filled the car with a pleasant gray hue.

She couldn’t stop crying.

Her notebook was already stained with tears, almost completely unusable. She set aside her pencil and buried her face in her gloves.

What kind of monster was she, pushing her away like that? Why did she have such an outrageous outburst when she knew full well she was nowhere near innocent?

Beatrice was a hypocrite and a liar.

Of course she hadn’t decided not to join the priesthood. For all her years in school, it was all she had ever been interested in, learning the full capabilities of magic and spreading the harmony of the Church to the rest of Tsubasa. It had all been going swimmingly right up until that stupid rich girl shoved herself right into her life and crystalized her heart.

And now that same heart had shattered.

No– Beatrice had shattered.

This five-day trip back to Balarand was like her own personal prison, and she deserved every second she got.

Beatrice didn’t want to think about this anymore.

She didn’t want to think about anything.

And yet, it was the only thing that her mind gravitated towards. No amount of crying was going to stop that now.

Perhaps she would make it back to the city, go back to her home, look back at her family, and tell them that everything they feared about that rich girl came true. Tell them that everything they hoped for was a visage shrouded over the face of reality like a woman in a wedding veil. But, somehow, she knew she wouldn’t tell anyone else. She would carry the burden all by herself because that’s all she ever knew how to do.

All this time, Beatrice had felt so conflicted, so divided about the Will of the Gods, to the point that maybe she wasn’t even sure if they were… Gods, she was so sorry for everything. To think she would be so deluded. So deluded to think that she could go down the path to priesthood and then turn away at the last second… All for some girl. She lied to that girl and broke her heart.

And at the same time, her own heart had already crumbled into dust, swept away by the icy winds.

Beatrice picked up the metallic box sitting across from her. It was the present that Emi had made for her, that she had tinkered on for ages, that she had designed completely on her own from the parts up, that she had cried about when she didn’t think she’d finish on time, that she made specifically for her.

She cranked the lever and watched the animation play out, the figure walking and then jumping over a hill. It was beautiful. It was like magic, the way the image seemed to move all on its own.

And then Beatrice dropped it.

At that moment, and for the rest of her life, Beatrice would never be able to remember the truth. She would never be able to know for sure whether it was on accident, or whether it was on purpose–whether it slipped from her feeble hands, or whether it was tossed down with the strength of her arms.

The intention was irrelevant, because seconds later, it collided with the floor of the carriage and broke apart into countless tiny gears, springs, and other unrecognizable pieces.

Whatever the intention was, Emi’s machine was now Beatrice’s heart.

Later, the caravan stopped for a rest break and the hordes of rich people left their carriages to stretch their legs and relieve themselves. Beatrice saw Emi in the distance, just the back of her long, dark hair. It was only a one-second glimpse before Beatrice turned away to look elsewhere. She was sure nobody else had noticed. But deep inside of her, in the gap where her heart used to be, in the remains of the machine she had broken, welled up a brand-new sense that she had never felt before, but nonetheless instantly recognized: shame.

Beatrice hated Emi almost as much as she hated herself.

<== Previous ♡ Next ==>

Chapter 50: Let’s Talk.

Emi and Beatrice laid on the huge bed, huddled up under the covers, looking deeply into each other’s eyes. They held hands, but with Emi’s grip so tight it left them both with great discomfort.

The moons shone through the window, but other than that, the room was in darkness.

“You’re getting married,” Beatrice said, her voice steady and measured. “You’re engaged to a noblewoman from Zahn you’ve never even met, and you’re getting married on the night of the Moon Festivals.”

“Y-yes.” Emi replied, her voice broken up by whimpers and sobs.

“You’ve known about this since before we met.”

“It’s been… a while. Five years, I think.”

“So that explains why you started avoiding me after our first date. You realized what was happening and you wanted to leave me alone.”

“I… I guess so. I barely remember.” Emi covered her face with her elbow, trying to hide her tears even as loudly as they came out.

“Why didn’t you tell me, then? If you had just been honest…”

“I don’t know,” she said. “I was scared. I’m still scared.”

Beatrice sat up and let go of Emi’s hand. “Why? Were you scared of what I’d think? That I’d stop meeting with you and having fun with you because you were engaged? Because you thought it’d hurt my feelings?”

“I, well…”

“Did you really think it was okay to keep this a secret from me?”

A million little thoughts ran through Emi’s head right now, all of them covered in tears and bashing against each other in explosions of rationale and regret. She couldn’t think coherently enough to deliver any sort of adequate response.

All she knew was this: She had failed.

“I love you,” Emi eventually managed to say. “I really do.”

“No you don’t,” Beatrice said. “I’m just some… some fling before your real wife comes along.”

“No, that’s not true!” Emi shouted. “I don’t love her. I don’t even know her. What I said in the carriage, what I’ve said to you all along, it’s all true. There’s nobody more important in my life than you.”

“Then why wouldn’t you tell me about this?!”

Emi sat up too, and rested both hands against her temples.

Why, Emi? Why hadn’t you told her, huh? Can’t you think of a reason? Any at all?

“I won’t get married to Lady Khara,” Emi whispered. But her voice grew as she continued. “I won’t. I refuse. Tris, let’s run off together. We can get married tomorrow and go wherever we want! I’ll follow you to the ends of Tsubasa, no matter where you go. I swear it.”

“…No you won’t. Please stop… stop lying to me.”

“No, I‘m not lying!” Emi took a pillow off the bed and threw it as hard as she could towards a window. It bounced off and plopped on the floor. Both of them laughed, and for a moment everything felt okay again. But the softness faded back into the darkness, and Beatrice’s glare set itself back onto Emi’s face.

She continued. “I don’t even want to be part of my family anymore. The Ragnell Family is nice and fun and happy and you eat dinner together and your dad is amazing. The L’Hime Family is the opposite. We’re just desperate, conniving collaborators with Dannark and it’s all our fault those monsters rule over our country with an iron fist. I hate everything we stand for.”

“You’re going to bring politics into this? You know our rule.”

“I’m… I’m sorry.” Emi shriveled up and sank back into the bed. “All this time I’ve worried about what you’d think about me, as some sort of rich snob who doesn’t understand a thing about how the real world works, and if I messed up even a little bit, you’d…”

“I’d…”

“I don’t know, desert me and join the priesthood.”

“And I thought I was the moron in our relationship,” Beatrice said. “I was never going to join the priesthood, Emi! Not after I met you. All this time I’ve been wondering if I was the weak link, if my indecision about becoming a priest was going to ruin our relationship and I was causing you so much stress.”

“It’s not, I promise,” she said. “I’ve always been worried but it’s not a big deal, because I… I know whatever choice you made will be the best one. You always make the right decisions.”

“You make me feel like such a jerk,” Beatrice said.

“Wh… What? What did I say?”

“Nothing, sorry. The priesthood doesn’t matter. I figured it out the plan. I was going to… I was going to take the exam and then I was going to decline it even if I passed… and then I was going to show the papers to you and tear them in half. And I… never told you, because I wanted to keep it a secret.” Beatrice’s lips quivered as she said what even Emi knew was a lie.

But it was a lie that made her heart just a little bit warmer. “Then why don’t we go? Why don’t we just fix this like we always do and move on? We can travel Tsubasa together and help people, just like you always wanted.”

“Because… Because you’re getting married, Emi. You can’t just run away from that.”

“Yes I can.”

“And ruin the rest of your life? Abandon a family that loves and cares for you?”

“That’s my entire plan,” Emi said. “I don’t care about them. I care about you.”

“You know you can’t do it…”

“Then it’s the same with you, Tris. You’re lying about making your mind up. I know you want to become a priest more than anything, because you are a wonderful woman who cares about the rest of the world and wants to actually do something about it. You’re exactly the person the Church needs, and you know it.”

Beatrice started crying, finally. “I’m so sorry…”

“It’s okay.” Emi reached in to hug her, but Beatrice rolled to the other side of the bed, facing away from her. Even so, Emi wrapped her arms around her and touched her cheek to her neck. She was so hot… Beatrice’s shoulders stiffened, and she took a sharp breath. But after a moment she relaxed. She took Emi’s arms and put them up against her chest. Her fingers traced down the line of her collarbone.

“Emi…”

“It’s okay,” she repeated. “It’s all okay.”

“But… No.”

“No?”

“It’s not okay, Beatrice told her. “If we stay together, your parents will hate me for leading you from your role. My parents will hate you for making me crush my dreams. We’re… not supposed to do this, I think. The Gods don’t want it. But… even if all of that is true… do you want to do it anyway? Can we really run away together?”

Emi thought about this for a long time. All she wanted to do was turn to Beatrice, smile, and say, “Yes. Let’s go. I don’t care where; let’s just go.” She wanted so desperately to hoist her girlfriend up into her arms and sprint into the nearest church so they could be married and ride off into the horizon in their carriage. She had even suggested this very thing just minutes earlier.

But when she opened her mouth to speak, the words did not match.

“No, I can’t, Tris…”

“Don’t call me that. My name is Beatrice.”

Emi winced. “Beatrice.. I’m so sorry… I can’t let you abandon your dreams for me. I’m just some girl.”

“You’re not just some girl! How dare you. You’re the woman I’ve fallen in love with, and I’d give up everything for you.”

“You shouldn’t… I’m already taken,” Emi said.

“You can’t just stay and get married to someone you’ve never met. That’s just idiotic.”

“But isn’t that what I said a minute ago?”

“It– I don’t know, Emi. I just…”

“Maybe…” This argument was going around in circles. There was no way to resolve it. “Maybe none of this would have happened if I had been honest with you from the start.”

“You’re right, Emi, maybe you should have been honest,” Beatrice said. “Maybe I shouldn’t have been such an idiot.”

“This was all a mistake,” Emi said. “Coming here, talking about this, being…” Emi didn’t dare finish that sentence.

A silence permeated the darkness for some time. No more crying, no more talking. It was the kind of quiet that could only be broken in the same way as a fragile glass–with a sharp note.

And Beatrice was the one to break that silence: “I think I hate you.”

Emi gripped her tighter, buried her face in her back. “Me too, Beatrice.”

They stayed like this for a long time, holding each other in the night and filling the bed with tears. They hoped the light of the moons would guide them to some sort of healing… but they knew the glass had been shattered.

<== Previous ♡ Next ==>

Chapter 49: Hands Held

It took a very long time, but eventually, Emi and Beatrice were able to get away from Lord Lau and his well-meaning tour guide mentality, and they went off to explore Mammoth Pass on their own.

The Mammoth Festivals went on for a month out of every year, so the entire city was lit up with ice sculptures and skating rinks and people bustling about. Because it lasted much longer than Balarand’s Winter Ceremonies, it was not a super-concentrated explosion of entertainment, but instead a shift for the entire city’s atmosphere. So it was festive everywhere you looked, but also much calmer. The lack of protestors everywhere probably helped improve the mood, too.

The two girls were now making up for all the lost hand-holding time from all the days being led through the city like a Mammoth herd along with all their wealthy companions. Beatrice still wore her traditional Balarand outfit, and Emi had on her warmest sweater and thickest of jackets. The woman truly did not like cold weather. It was silly, but Beatrice liked that about her.

“Where do you want to go now?” Emi asked.

“I don’t know, Emi,” Beatrice said. “You’ve been here before. Where do you recommend?”

“Well, I was always part of those big tourist groups of Balarand elites wandering around,” Emi said. “I’ve never been in Mammoth Pass with any free time before.

“Well, is there anything you haven’t seen that you want to?”

Emi paused. “Uhhh…” She seemed to be struggling to come up with anything at all. The sun was already starting to set, and Beatrice knew this was their last opportunity. Her foot automatically tapped against the wet stone sidewalk in anticipation.

“Oh!” she exclaimed, finally. “I remember. There’s a neighborhood where they do celebrations for the mountain tribes who still live here. Why don’t we go there?”

“That sounds like fun, I guess. What goes on there?”

“I don’t know. But there’s probably food.”

“Let’s go!”

Eating was quickly superseding reading as Beatrice’s favorite hobby. She blamed it on the fact that Emi always offered to pay. As much as she tried to refuse, she couldn’t bring herself to turn down every snack that came their way. Or any of them.

They departed from the castle district and entered another section of the city, one where the curved towers disappeared and were replaced with more typical wooden structures. The stone-built buildings familiar in Balarand were not a common site here; structures were either built directly into the mountains, or made of simple wood. Beatrice guessed the risk of a fire was a lot less here considering how cold it stayed.

They walked down a street. A Mammoth trotted alongside them as a lacksidasial pace, and a parade of cheering people danced behind it. It must have been the world’s slowest parade, Beatrice thought, but they seemed to be enjoying it.

There on the street was a magnificent site, a marketplace-turned-party shining with lights and loud with music. Dozens of wooden stands sold all sorts of foods and trinkets. People jumped and jived, singing along to music in some language she had never heard before. It was lively and vibrant, almost intoxicatingly so.

This was the harmony of the Gods. Nature and humans having joyous fun together. Mammoths marching gallantly while people celebrated the turning of the seasons. Every element of Tsubasa working as ingredients of a whole. The gears in their grand machine turning in a rhythmic dance.

A man in an oversized mask came up to them and clapped his hands, shouting in that same language while gesturing for them to come closer.

Beatrice wasn’t quite sure–

But then Emi dashed forward and pulled Beatrice along into the dance circle. “Come on!”

“Oh, you know I can’t dance,” Beatrice said.

“But I can, so you don’t have to worry about it,” Emi said. “Let’s go.”

Emi held out her arm for Beatrice to join her. And, as if Beatrice was being magnetically levitated towards her girlfriend… she found herself caught in her arms.

Love really was magic.

“Care for a dance?” Emi asked.

“I guess so,” Beatrice said eyes dazed in bewilderment.

Emi, holding onto Beatrice’s fingers, swung around, vaguely matching the beat, and laughed. She lifted Beatrice’s arm into the air and twirled around underneath it.

Beatrice moved around trying to give her enough space to dance, but she mostly shuffled in place while Emi did all of the fancy moves. With all her studies and skills, she really wished she could do better than this, but she had finally entered the realm where her talent was of zero use.

“Tris, come on and get into the music,” Emi commanded.

“I’m trying.” The drums beat rhythmically, loudly, and the singer wailed out with a raspy fire. It was catchy and fun, but Beatrice didn’t feel the groove to move.

For a girl who dealt so poorly with large crowds and social events, Emi sure did like to dance. She guessed it felt more like a solitary activity for her, even if it was in the middle of a jumble of people. Though, it would probably be less solitary if Beatrice would join in…

Ah, whatever. Beatrice would try her best even if it turned out badly– she let the music take her and joined into Emi’s dance. They jumped and swayed and spun and hummed, kissed and laughed and shook and twirled.

The two went until well after the current song was over, until well after Beatrice was too tired to continue. She let go of Emi and dropped to her knees, panting.

“That was… fun…” she said in between breaths.

“You’re the best,” Emi said.

“Not at dancing…”

“Who cares if you’re bad or good? It’s supposed to be fun. Not all that rigid stuff they do at fancy parties.” She extended her hand and pulled Beatrice back on her feet. “Now, I did promise you food, Tris. What do you want?”

Her stomach gurgled loudly. “Every item from every single booth.”

“Okay, I’ll do it.” She flashed a grin that showed off her perfect teeth, that made her dark brown eyes sparkle.

Beatrice shook her head. “Marry me.”

“Uh… I’ll consider it,” Emi said.

Would she really consider it? It was a joke, turning the tables on that proposal Emi made all that time ago, back when holding hands and riding a gondola was all it took to send Beatrice into a lovey-dovey haze. It was a joke, but…

Honestly, if Emi knelt down and proposed to Beatrice right now, holding out a ring and letting that smile work its magic, Beatrice wasn’t sure what her answer would be. For a girl she had only dated for a matter of months, the answer should have been a flat “no way,” but… Given the moment and the fact that she had never loved someone so much in her life, given the fact that every part of her soul gravitated to those dark brown eyes and that tall, curved body and that warm palm rubbed up against her own… Beatrice would have to think about it.

Emi had said just a few days ago in the carriage, as Beatrice recited by heart, “I’m being completely serious when I say I’d follow you no matter what you do.” It kind of made her giddy to think about, even if it was most likely never going to happen.

Even if she knew the Priesthood Exams were just weeks away…

Beatrice knew she shouldn’t have thought of the Priesthood Exams at a time like this. The vortex of stress in the corner of her mind would do nothing to improve her mood. It had no purpose right now, right here with Emi. She could worry about that when they returned to Balarand. Up here in Mammoth Pass, right here on the busy festival street, there was no priesthood for her to waver on. no important life decisions to decide upon. There was only good food, fun music, and the love of her life by her side.

The two girls made their way to the food stands and saw a stand selling “striderskin bites,” which appeared to be, well, edible striderskin.

Striderskin is the chitin that the giant insects known as striders shed after moulting. Because they roam the Plebias Mountains, one of the coldest areas on the continent, they shed only on rare occasions, and hunters make a living off finding the skins and selling them. Killing a strider is nigh impossible, with their speed so fast it’s thought to be magic, so hunters make do with what’s left behind. The chitin is typically used for clothing, but Mammoth Pass is known for its striderskin delicacies. You think that’s gross? Me too. Very gross.

“I’ll take one box,” Beatrice said to the vendor.

Emi gave a look of disgust. “Really?”

“I have to try it. I’m so hungry.” Beatrice took the box, thanked the vendor, and opened it to reveal several bite-sized chips of what used to be the exoskeleton of a large insect.

She gulped, and then… chowed down.

“This is… not too bad. Chewy, but very savory.”

“Good for you, but I don’t think I’ll try it,” Emi said, waving the box away as Beatrice tilted it toward her. She turned around to a different table and bought a simple old meat spike. “I’m fine with some good old fashioned meat.” She put the stick in her mouth and removed the first two pieces with her teeth.

“What kind of meat is it?” Beatrice asked.

“I don’t know. Probably beef of some sort.” She turned around to examine the table more closely. The sign was in another language, though. “Yeah… I’m just going to assume that it’s beef and hope for the best.”

This whole district was strange and unfamiliar, and somehow that piqued Beatrice’s curiosity more than anything. Nowhere else in the larger continent of Tsubasa did such cultures thrive; as Dannark, Elince, Doros, and Zahn expanded over the centuries, many smaller places were absorbed into the larger countries around them. Their traditions did not die off completely, but many aspects of their former existences disappeared, including their languages.

To hear languages Beatrice couldn’t understand was such an interesting experience. It was the first time in her whole life she found herself in this situation, where the people around her celebrated and worshipped, sang praises to the Gods in tongues completely foreign to her. And for some strange reason, she felt excited. This… this was the rest of the world, as far away from her home as she’d ever been.

Whether or not Beatrice really became a priest, this is what she wanted to protect with the most of her power. The ability for people to feel comfortable, to feel powerful enough to celebrate whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted, however they wanted. She wanted to end war, to end the struggles of hunger and sadness. She wanted to see culture thrive, so every day in every city in the continent could be as festive tonight.

“I love you,” Beatrice said. She didn’t know why, but she just had the urge to say it.

“I love you too,” Emi said in return. Though, she seemed more preoccupied by the sights around them.

Like at the marketplaces in Balarand, it was more fun to walk down the long rows of vendors and simply look at the items for sale than to actually buy anything. Beatrice was not a fan of haggling, even though it was such a common exercise in places like this, so she found it more comfortable to simply browse.

Then– Gods, what was that?

There was a small iron cage with a flickering, winged creature darting about, clearly trying to escape. Beatrice had never seen anything like it. But the vendor selling it, a twirly mustached man with a hardened face, did not seem like he was the type to introduce his wares to a couple curious girls.

“Wow! A fairy all the way up here!” Emi exclaimed.

Wait, what? “Wait, what?”

Then Emi grew a devious, self-satisfied smile. “See! You told me fairies weren’t real! Look right here and take back everything you said.”

“A fairy… No way.”

Beatrice stepped closer to the cage and looked at the beast. The closer she looked, the more detail she could see on its… its remarkably creepy face. It had two eyes, a nose, and a mouth, but it looked more like a misshapen monster than a sentient being.

It met Beatrice’s gaze… and snarled.

She yelped and catapulted herself backwards.

Emi didn’t stop laughing for the next six minutes.

Eventually, they walked to what appeared to be the end of the tribal festivities, where the food stands were nowhere to be seen and the joyful music played faintly behind them. The moons shone bright in the sky, and the air was tinged with frost.

“Do you want to go back to the room?” Emi asked. “Or is there anything else?”

“Yeah, I think it’s about time,” Beatrice said. She was ready to get out of this cold weather and cuddle with her girlfriend, though she still felt like there was so much they could be doing in Mammoth Pass before they left.

“Let’s go back, then.”

They were not sure where they were, but because the castle stuck out in the skyline so prominently, it was very easy to figure out what direction to go in. So they made their way back, only to find more festivities going on in front of the castle. There was a great bonfire and many people, the same rich Balarandians they had travelled with, huddled around it for gossip and dance and drunk. They must also have been trying to make the most of their final day in the city.

Lord Lau was among them. He met their gazes lazily staggered over to them. “Hello, ladies,” he said. “Welcome back. Are you ready to have some fun?”

“Ah, no, we are just going back to the castle,” Emi said. “It’s gotten quite late.”

“Nonsense,” Lord Lau said. “Your parents would commend your good behavior, but–Hic!–they aren’t even here!” He began laughing.

Beatrice thought it was amusing, but it was probably more than a little bit embarrassing to the girl who had grown up under this old man’s care.

“Come on, Beatrice. Let’s go to bed.”

“You know, Ms. L’Hime, your new wife is a very nice woman,” Lord Lau said. “I used to have someone dear to me like her. But when she passed I felt a great sadness that has not left my being even after twenty years. Cherish your wife while you can.”

“We’re not married. Not yet at least.” Beatrice giggled.

Lord Lau looked off into the distance like he was trying to solve a mathematical equation. “Oh, that’s right. Your engagement is still tenuous, is it not. And the wedding is in the spring with the Moon Festivals. Or was it last spring? Didn’t your parents invite me to your wedding? I can’t quite recall at the moment. My–Hic!–apologies.”

What was this man talking about? Clearly he was inebriated past the point of coherence but he was kind of hilarious, Beatrice thought.

Emi, however, held a frightened face. Her chest puffed out with every breath, and her already-cold hand had become an icicle in Beatrice’s palm. “No, Lord Lau. You’re just misremembering things. I think you should take it easy,” she said. She giggled nervously. Beatrice raised an eyebrow.

“Well then…” He seemed to think long and hard about this. “Well, I hope you have a good night, Emi. And it was nice–Hic!–meeting you for this trip, Lady Khara.”

Who? Huh?

Beatrice looked at Emi, but she darted her eyes away.

Okay then… Something was going on.

“Emi… who is Lady Khara?”

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Chapter 48: A Great Museum

Next, Lord Lau took Beatrice and Emi to a new sight altogether: the National Museum of Mammoth Pass, one of Dannark’s many cultural museums dedicated to preserving its history and art.

In Balarand, the construction of a museum shortly after the occupation was a source of great controversy. It housed the Jewel of Elince, the nation’s most precious artifact, and the occupational government refused to allow the people to take it out it during the Winter Ceremonies. Many boycotted the museum in protest, and there was word of serious financial troubles already.

Emi imagined there had been tensions about the same things here in Mammoth Pass long ago, but it had settled out over time. Would Elince ever become the same way? Would the occupation even last such a long time?

They entered the museum and were immediately greeted with a huge skeleton of a Mammoth on display, right at the entrance.

That seemed blasphemous to a high degree.

“Do not worry,” Lord Lau said. “It is merely a model. Mammoth bones always burned in this city, not stored and displayed. As if we were savages, really…”

“That wasn’t there the last time I came here,” Emi said.

“The Empress herself requested it last year,” he said. “They had to make do with an imitation, but it was the best that could be done without upsetting the Gods.”

Hmm… Emi didn’t like this.

Beatrice had come here, excited to learn a lot from the museum and even wore her traditional ancient Balarand-style outfit, the one with the sash and cape and everything. But the first thing here was a sight that could be outright blasphemous to her whole religion. Was this really okay? Emi wondered what Bk’Man would think if Balarand performed rituals to appease Him, but kept an effigy of one of His servants on display as well. It seemed mighty suspicious. She wasn’t the junior priest, though, so what did she know?

Her girlfriend seemed to notice the way Emi was fretting. “It’s fine,” Beatrice told her. “I think it’s pretty cool. My Dad would absolutely love this place.”

“Ah, your father is interested in this sort of place? He must be an esteemed scholar,” Lord Lau said.

“Not really,” Beatrice said. “He just likes studying about the ancient cultures in Tsubasa. They used to have more magic and completely different languages, apparently.”

“You must tell him everything you learn here, then,” Lord Lau said. “I will give you the most comprehensive tour I can.”

Emi most certainly did not want to be given the most comprehensive tour Lord Lau could give, because she had known this man for most of her life. If he spoke, they wouldn’t make it past the first exhibit by the end of the day.

“I do wish your Dad was here,” Emi said. “I love that man.”

“What do you know, I love him too,” said Beatrice.

“I wish I could have taken your whole family and shown them all of this cool stuff so they could be happy. But I’m not good enough yet.”

“Oh, don’t worry, Emi. My parents are happy just like they are. My Dad has to stay and support the library, because there aren’t many people who work there. And my Mom won’t go anywhere without him. So really, it’s okay.”

“If you say so…”

“Let us explore history and nature,” said Lord Lau. “Follow me. I shall show you the latest discoveries by researchers that have explored the northern portion of Tsubasa looking for preserved specimens of ancient life. So far, they have found a great number of promising…”

Beatrice began following him towards the exhibit on “Animals of the Plebias Mountains” and had a happy smile on her face. No! She didn’t know what she was in for!

She tugged on Beatrice’s jacket and whispered, “Come on. We need to get away from him.”

“What, how come?”

“…fifteen years since the previous fossil, and in that time they suspected the whole species was naught but a…” Lord Lau stopped and turned around. “Is anything the matter?”

“Nothing, we just need to visit the ladies’ room,” Emi said. She pulled her girlfriend with her towards the bathroom, but after they turned the corner towards a display of ancient tools used six thousand years ago, she stopped.

“What’s wrong?” Beatrice asked.

“Lord Lau lectures lots,” Emi said. “Once, when I was five years old, he told me about the Romance of Zahn, that old epic poem, and how the real-life events differed from the story. He went on for over six hours. I was five years old.”

“And you listened the whole time? That’s so sweet.” Beatrice leaned in for a kiss but Emi put her hand in front of her face. It was not a deserving moment, and Beatrice was not getting away with it.

“I just think that, even if this museum is really cool… maybe we should try to find more things to do since we only have a couple days left in Mammoth Pass.”

“But Lord Lau is so nice,” Beatrice said.

“You’re right, but… Oh hey, look at that.”

“Eh?”

Emi walked up to a painting in this display of ancient traditions, titled The First Winter Ceremonies, by Tormod Benici. “This is the same painting I have in my bedroom. Isn’t that neat?” It was a swirling mix of blues and whites showing off ancient Balarand, with pink-hued decorations adorning the snow-covered buildings. Beatrice and her dark-gray outfit complimented the painting well.

“Why do you have a fake painting in your bedroom again?” Beatrice asked. “I think I’ve asked this before but I forget. It’s kind of weird, isn’t it?

“You haven’t, because the answer is… I have no idea.” Emi shrugged. “It’s been there since I was a child. I like it.”

“That’s cute. You’re cute.” Beatrice leaned in for a kiss, but was again rebuffed by Emi’s palm. Not right now buddy.

They passed by another small exhibit, one showing off magic golems, like the one Runa was working on in her lab. Right now, all that was showing was a metallic core, but there was a large crank in front of the display. Beatrice seemed to be intentionally ignoring it, but Emi stepped over to the display and turned the lever. As she did, a bunch of rocks on wires emerged from holes in the exhibit and moved close to the core, forming a humanoid body. Haha, it was a self-assembling golem using levers and pulleys. Emi thought it was so neat.

Beatrice had long since moved on from the exhibit, though. She really didn’t like Runa’s experiments, did she?

“Oh, Emi, look at this!” she suddenly exclaimed.

“Oh yeah, what is– Ack!”

Emi let out a shriek as she saw the next exhibit– a massive greyback bear, twice the size of a human. It was a fake model, painted, but still. Terrifying stuff.

“It appears that this was the greyback of many thousands of years ago,” Beatrice said. “They got smaller over time and now they’re just your friendly neighborhood scavenger. Man, this thing looks like it could eat a human though!”

“I wish I never saw this,” Emi said. “Knowing a creature like this ever existed is bad for my mental health.”

“You’ve got more problems than your mental health, so don’t worry,” said Beatrice.

Despite the brazen insult, Emi only giggled.

Lord Lau finally caught up with them a few minutes later when they were in an area that showed off the architecture of ancient tribes around the Plebias Mountains.

“Oh, there you are. I had wondered if you had not been suddenly whisked away by pesky spirits.” He saw the crude stone tools on display next to them and his eyes lit up. “Actually, this is a fine exhibit as well,” he said. “Elince had a wide variety of early historic traditions, but they were far from the first civilization to form on the continent. Did you know the earliest evidence of civilization on Tsubasa actually comes from the Frozen Desert? Archaeologists have scoured the mysterious region for clues to its history, but all that we can find are broken-down structures and tools like these, stretching back ten to twelve thousand years in the past. Because we cannot find similar evidence in the rest of the continent that is as old as this, we can only assume that the climate must have been significantly different back in those times, as…”

Emi groaned and Beatrice laughed.

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